Physician, heal thyself used to be a popular saying, but you don’t hear it as much anymore. Having body confidence would fall into that category as well. In order to help others do it, you have to do it yourself. Believe me, I know what it is like to wake up and avoid looking in the mirror because I just didn’t want to see myself anymore. But now is the time to stop hating yourself and grow into a confident woman. You can do this because you are on fire!
Here are 7 questions that help you to quit dousing your own flame and build your body confidence.
What do I love about my body?
I asked a woman this once, and do you know what she said? “ My eyes.” They are the windows to the soul. I was so intrigued I continued asking various women what they loved about their bodies. One said her full lips, another said her legs, another her neck. Pick everything you love about yourself and focus on that – and remember, nothing is too small to start.
What have others loved?
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and sometimes we are just too damn hard on ourselves. Think about people who have been complimentary about your looks in the past. What have they always emphasized? I also want you to start owning the compliments that you receive. Don’t brush it off or downplay it, and you surely don’t have to feel the need to return a compliment because you received one. Say thank you, and be proud.
Why do I like what I dislike?
This can be an emotional question to ask ourselves. Sometimes when we are children, or young adults, or even older adults, one comment, one sideways glance can change the way we feel about ourselves forever. I want you to think long and hard about this: is the way you feel about your body a result of your own opinion, or is it someone else’s opinion that you have accepted as truth? Don’t hold yourself captive with the opinion of someone who just doesn’t matter. It is time to break free.
Who am I trying to please?
We can say we want to please ourselves primarily, but let’s be honest: that’s not always the case. Maybe you want to catch someone’s eye or you want to make a great impression at work, heck maybe you just want to look great naked. I want you to realize whomever you’re trying to please is all well and good, but at the end of the day this is your body, and nobody can love it better thank you do. Be kind to it.
What makes me feel amazing?
Do you feel best at home in your sweats or dolled up in an evening gown? Raising your confidence isn’t always about wearing lots of makeup and/or cutting your hair. Confidence sometimes comes as by as knowing you fit in where you are. Find your place, and hang out in it often.
Who makes me feel like crap?
Is there a negative Nancy on your squad? It may be time to let that friendship go. There are always going to be people in life who hone in on our insecurities and use them to make themselves feel better. You don’t need the negativity in your life. If the people in your corner aren’t lifting you up and making you feel like you can conquer the world, then you don’t need to call them “friends”.
Who has my back?
Learning to love your body is an emotional rollercoaster. You have to confront some serious primal fears and deep-seated issues. This is a journey that can sometimes feel lonely, but you will not have to make it alone. Look to your family and friends to see who has your back. Who can you call when the burdens you are learning to lift become too heavy. It usually doesn’t take much thought to figure out who is always around when trouble comes.
I want you to think long and hard about these body confidence building questions and ask yourself: how badly do you want this? Are you tired of hating what’s in the mirror? Are you tired of waiting to love yourself until you are ten pounds lighter or until you’ve worked through some rigorous point counting system? The time to love yourself is now.
Do you have any other reflection questions or tips to help build body confidence? Share with me in the comments below or on social media.
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